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The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.

the lord of the rings
Current Month
Jan. 1st, 2020 @ 12:00 am welcome one and all
since i've been writting in my old journal i believe that i have grown. i'm trying to be more honest with myself and with others. i am tired of having to censure my words because although i do not wish to offend anyone it is not healthy for me to keep things inside. i have remembered rather belatedly that this is first and formost my diary. i choose to share it with you all because i believe that you are my friends and that you will understand and take what i say with a grain of salt. i welcome you all to my new journal and invite you on my journey. may the stories and support you share with me inspire me to continue on. you are all my friends and i love you. otherwise why would i share this with you. so come sit by my fire and let me tell you a tale. we shall talk and spin yarns as the stars drift in the sky and we slowly slip into the world of dreams. and when the dreaming is all done i hope you will invite me to sit beside you in the fire light and listen to your voice. for i love a good story and you all have tales to tell

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hope for the future
Jun. 8th, 2008 @ 06:49 pm its been a while
well its been quite some time since i've done anything on here. honestly i haven't even checked the site for over 6 months. i wonder if anyone still uses this....

anyway. i'm not dead. i did finish my semester in japan. sorry to bail on everyone in the middle of the semester. life and drama got in the way. finished my last year of college back at northwest. by that time i just wasn't into writing posts here anymore.

so i'm all graduated now. yay for me and all that jazz. been living at home and looking for work. its not going well. but hey, story of my life. something will happen eventually.

to be honest with you i'm not sure if i'll end up using xanga or livejournal again after this. its good to keep in touch with people on a semi regular basis and its good to vent thoughts and be introspective. generally it doesn't work well for both. i keep straddling that line too. i don't like being all introspective and moody when i talk about my life but if anything i am terribly verbose so its bound to happen.

still i like to keep these things around. i can go back and read posts and remember what i was thinking and feeling at the time. it helps keep things in perspective. and that is always a good thing.

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hope for the future
May. 11th, 2007 @ 12:16 pm breaks, beats, books and babies
Current Location: Tokyo Japan
Current Mood: pensiveintrospective
there's been an outbreak of measles in the tokyo area. since this strain can be serious for adults my school has canceled all classes for next week. it's pretty sweet but i feel a little guilty for being happy when i know that its for something bad.highly introspective and mildly depressing rant as per usualCollapse )

well thats all i got for now folks. enjoy another emotional dumping compliments of several sad songs and sad stories over the past hour. now back to your regularly scheduled lives. hope you all enjoy them cus there the only one you get.
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weight of ages
Apr. 27th, 2007 @ 04:55 am a journal post from me thats not depressing? le gasp!
Current Location: Tokyo Japan
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
hey everyone. sorry i didn't post anything for a while. got busy and got distracted.

anyway so i'm doing like 500 times better now. since my last post i did get my card so money is not a problem anymore. it feels so good to be able to buy lunch again. i also got my commuter pass so i actually will save some money on transportation now. go me! things have deffinatly been looking up.

oh and you may not have heard but i got my phone turned on again. woots! now i can have a social life. yay! my number is 08067161503 and my email is 0hp32647267030@ezweb.ne.jp so you can send me emails and stuff. i know the email is anoying but i can't figure out how to change it. oh well.

my optimistic and fairly content ramblingsCollapse )

catch you all later.
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hope for the future
Apr. 13th, 2007 @ 12:43 pm so how do you say i'm screwed in japanese?
Current Location: Tokyo Japan
Current Mood: pessimisticpessimistic
never fear. i'm not dead. though i was starting to worry there for a bit. especially when my leg swelled up. that was odd and unexpected. but i am much better now.

life hates me sometimesCollapse )

i want to be in a good mood. everything just seems to be conspirering against me. meh. i'm going to bed.
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weight of ages
Apr. 4th, 2007 @ 04:30 am is there a doctor in the house. preferably one with english skills
Current Location: Tokyo Japan
Current Mood: sicksick
oh my god. i feel like shit. this sucks so bad because i brilliantly forgot to bring any pain reliever.does anyone know what causes you to be achy all over, have a horrifically splitting headache, feel uncontrolably tired whenever you move a muscle, not be able to stay warm for the life of you, and be on again off again nauseous. i feel like i'm dying and this post took me over 10 min to write because i had to rest every sentance or so.
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hope for the future
Apr. 2nd, 2007 @ 05:59 am time to crash
Current Location: Tokyo Japan
Current Mood: tiredtired
hey everyone, i'm back in japan and finally settled into my new dorm. its not to shabby but more one that later. first as always a recap on the last two weeks. they've been crazy.

long long rambles of my wanderingsCollapse )

anyway i like my room. its a private and its close to the laundry and toilets. i have to go to the third floor for the shower but thats ok. i even have a little balcony to hang my clothes out to dry on. and the bed is pretty comphy. not as soft as i would love but deffinatly not a boad . as of right now i'm doing laundry and chilling. i'm about to go have dinner cus they provide it and breakfast for us. pretty cool.

anyway this post is insanly long and i applogize. i have pics that i need to upload and i'm going to try to get the back log of photos from last semester up. well i'm going to wander off now. i'll be in touch later.

mata ne!
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hope for the future
Mar. 16th, 2007 @ 12:54 am have cash, will bribe
Current Location: Maryville MO
Current Mood: hyperbeggining
so is anyone willing to meet me at kansai international airport at aproximately 7pm on the 24th of march and help me locate my youth hostle i'll be staying at in osaka? i am willing to pay any train and bus fair you have and buy you dinner. plus you get to see stephy again. thats a good deal right? please? let me know.
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hope for the future
Feb. 24th, 2007 @ 01:34 pm dumb luck is my special ability
Current Location: Maryville MO
Current Mood: blahblah
so you haven't heard from me in a while. my bad. busy busy busy. well mostly sleepy sleepy sleepy and worky worky worky but oh well who's really paying attention. i've got just a month. i'm so close i can almost tast the yakisoba. mm mm good. i have my plane tickets. they were cheep but i'm flying northwest. i've not heard great things about northwest and especially about their international flights. sadly everything else was up near 2000 dollars for some reason. so i guess thats what i get. oh well.

i signed up for a study trip in japan next may. hehe. i'm counting it as a graduation pressent to myself. most of the places we will visit i probably wont get a chance to see while i'm over there this time. so i think it will work well. of course there's paying for it but i'll discuss that later. maybe its just reverse culture shock or something but i really do enjoy japan. and as always i can't wait to get back there and see everyone. i miss you guys bunches!

almost losing and regaining japan do to procrastinationCollapse )

so the drag show was yesterday. eh, it was better last year. and even better the year before that and so on. sometimes i think common ground should be whacked upside its head for all the stupid things they do. petty infighting always keeps anything good and lasting from happening. and since the executive board is replaced every year and most of the time hates the exec board from the last year no one will ask for help or advice. so its like doing something new every year. its so stupid. and thats why this years show really suffered. oh well. i did my time as president and did the best i could so i wash my hands of it. eh. still the drag king was really hot and i got to kiss him while he was performing. *grins*

we went to molly's afterwords. still to soon after meranda's party for me. alcohol still makes me a bit queesy every time a drink it. no one really looked like they were having a good time anyway. me and tj cut out and made a mcdonalds run because we were starving. when we came back it was still the same so after a while we cut out early. ended up taking a lot of people home. it worked out alright i guess but the bars just not as much fun if you don't have a buz. i ended up telling laura about herself and i don't think she liked it to much. she shouldn't have asked if i would answer a serious question because i will. i think she got pissed off and wandered elsewhere. oh well, she still came back when she needed a ride home. i don't feel bad because she asked me first.

and today its raining. meh. i wanted to go to the lake and just hang out. that would have been nice. oh well. i'm feeling very prickly and irritable today. kind of like a cactus. i kind of just want to be left alone. i think i will be happy to get out of here soon. love my roomate to death but i'm getting tired of his bitching and tall tales. eh. i need a vacation from life. to bad its not gonna happen.
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hope for the future
Jan. 24th, 2007 @ 09:58 am (no subject)
Current Location: Maryville, Mo
Current Mood: exhaustedexhausted
Current Music: Random 80's from lances alarm clock
i got the internet working. woots. hopefully you'll be seing more of me. but probably not since i'm still working 10 hour days. i hate this job
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hope for the future